Til now.
But then I can't help but question, is this really permanent for real?
In a way I guess, I can never know. And it's only been 5 days. This is... Bullocks. What have I put myself into? Is this the right thing? OMG. I think TOO much.
How do you stop thinking anyways? Ugh. At the same time I feel, this isn't helping much. Ranting out here prolly let's out some steam but then again it doesn't really give me much answers. Humans are such complicated beings! Or maybe it's cause I'm just too used to with the whole mind playing game. This is so consuming. I can feel myself feeling overwhelmed.
The conversation last night felt so fake. And I feel like I'm the only one reaching out here. Whatever la. Screw this. I think I look so dramatic, emotional and desperate. Either that or I'm just thinking too much again. Wtf. I hate my brain.
